(Reading time: 4 – 6 minutes)
Social media is all about relationships… right? But what kind of relationships? And with who? Nobody can be friends with everyone, and that’s where we seem to be led.
I’ve had chunks of this article brewing for months. I wasn’t sure I was ready to publish it. I wasn’t sure if the community-at-large was ready to tackle it head-on, but the leaders are ready, so let’s get to it.
We’ll start with Nathan Hangen’s January 6, 2010 article Your Dream is Under Attack. Nathan gets pretty lathered up, and I can’t say I blame him. He raises some very important questions about the business aspect of social media. Why is it wrong to want compensation for our time? The leaders in this growing industry are the most accessible of any, anywhere, and nobody is forced to buy. So what’s the problem?
Then fast forward to Chris Brogan’s article Redrawing. Chris, frankly, is looking a bit haggard there. For good reason, he keeps an insane schedule.
As it turns out, Elizabeth Potts Weinstein’s comment about not being able to keep up is especially pertinent to what follows here. I’m a dinky fish in this pond compared to Elizabeth, and I’m having a hard time keeping up too.
Jay Fleischman’s remarks about “disciples stepping up” are pertinent as well. How can we give back to people like Chris and others who have given so freely? Money, sure, but there has to be more (help those looking up to us?)
Finally, we return to Nathan’s Social Media has Become a Virus. Full circle.
Hat tip Kelly Diels: added something highly relevant from Naomi Dunford. Check it out, do you agree?
If you haven’t read these articles, please, take the time. It’s Sunday, right? You can spare it.
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Now that you’re back, note there’s two threads intertwined, money, and social media. We’re going to talk about social media in this article. (The money aspect rates it’s own article.)
Here’s the skinny:
It’s just not possible.
But why take my word for it when Jeremiah Owyang can lay down the law. If you haven’t heard of Owyang before, his articles get 1000s of retweets. 1000s. This means even if he’s wrong, he’s right.
Sure, you can do a lot. And when you try, it will never be enough.
So why bother?
I can see it. I can feel it. I have even earned a little, tiny bit of that gold myself.
But earning enough gold to keep the landlord happy will require scaling right out of my social media comfort zone. If you’re a regular reader here, you’re probably going to have to scale out of your social media comfort zone too.
Let’s back up a bit and get some context.
Take stock now
Here’s what I’d like you to do (I’ve done this for myself):
- Enjoy all the articles I’ve freely posted here and on my other websites. Long time readers know Website In A Weekend’s sole reason for creation was a landing site for an ecourse and a live PAID seminar. We may go full circle yet.
And… (you’re not done yet)
Enjoy and appreciate the work others have put into their websites and blogs, asking for nothing more than a tiny sliver of your attention.
- Use and enjoy the WordPress plugins I’m developing or maintaining. I have future plans to monetize hRecipe, but the core functionality will always be free; your time investment is protected. In truth, I love programming free software, and I’ve been doing it since 1994.
Likewise, reflect for a moment how blessed we are that we have a platform such as WordPress. I remember before WordPress. Too well.
- Think very hard about why you are paying hosting fees for your blog, why you spend time on Twitter, how you interact with people on Twitter and on your blog, and where you want to take all of this. I’m going to refer you back to this point in a future article.
Redraw yourself
Then let’s talk:
- What do you need to do to get from where you are now to where you’re going?
- How are you planning to get what you need?
- How absolutely committed are you to the process of success? (Hint: getting through The Dip requires keeping on keeping on, even when you don’t feel like it.)
How, exactly, are you going handle social media when you have gone far past the point of widespread personal interaction with everyone who looks to you for guidance, leadership, inspiration and motivation?
By the way, I can still answer every comment here… and delighted to do so. Tell me:
I’m going to jump the gun here and mention a new little project I have under way: I adopted a small, but super useful plugin. Some of you are using it. I intend on making it more useful.
I was going to release the next version yesterday, that is, Saturday March 20, 2010.
Instead, I got caught up in email and CommentLuv post, both of which exploded in my face. Felt like Wile E. Coyote, I did. Careful what you wish for.
So the plugin didn’t get released. Getting it released, which means fixing the current code, adding new code, updating documentation, translations and more… is going to mean I do NOT get around to visiting many blogs I would like to visit. I feel bad about that.
Watch for more in a week from Tuesday (March 30 2010).
Awww, shucks. And there was me thinking you were going to provide the answer to solve all this ;)
Funnily enough, I read Nathan’s piece about the virus of social media just last night. I don’t know what the answer is but thinking about the large companies that Nathan referred to, it’s possible that the answer for them would be to employ a person whose sole responsibility would be to keep on top of the social media contact. I don’t know if they would want to this but given they have a larger budget than you or I, it’s at least an option ;)
For the rest of us mere mortals (and I include Give A Brick in this even though it’s not an issue for us yet) I guess it has to be about finding a balance.
With the exception of one person, everyone who has given a brick has been someone I’ve got to know on here. I can’t say I know every one of them very well but we have at least communicated. They’ve enjoyed the blog, left a comment maybe and if they have their own site, I’ve gone back to see what they’re about.
But the thought has already crossed my mind that since we need about another 68,800 people to Give A Brick in order to finish our first project, does current form dictate that I’m going to need to get to know another 68,800 people over the coming months? A daunting thought :roll:
I look forward to following this dialogue. Maybe someone has the answer :)
.-= Eleanor Edwards´s last blog ..From acts of random kindness to taking over the world, it must be our Winter round-up 2010 =-.
Eleanor, this is what’s also known as a “high quality problem.”
I’ll be on the lookout for other people working in the realm of very small transactions.
Also, I bet having a newsletter is going to help you quite a bit.
I still haven’t managed to persuade our treasurer that a small non-profit needs aweber. We have a list which we do via Google which is free. I’ll keep working on him as would love to be a part of your experiment ;)
.-= Eleanor Edwards´s last blog ..1 Minute Motivator: Rinse and repeat =-.
I am not sure there is an answer that fits everyone. My answer may work for me – not that I have figured it out yet – but may not work for Eleanor or Dave.
Right now I can answer comments and can make connections in social media. When work gets more demanding, I cannot always do any of that.
Large companies are coming around to the fact they need at least one, if not an entire team, to manage social media. They need a social media policy so that all of these people – or this person – knows how to respond. This is a long time coming and is slow for adaptation but is getting to be more the norm than the exception.
.-= Nicki´s last blog ..The Tulips =-.
Hi Nicki. You’re right, everyone is going to have to come up with their own solutions, or at least a mix of standard solutions. Which has me thinking…
But I need code today!
It starts when we stop treating social media like it’s some sort of special little angel.
Then, we’ve got to be honest with ourselves and realize that not only doesn’t it scale from our side, but it also doesn’t scale anywhere else. Don’t expect miracles.
Thanks for the feedback and mention Dave, I appreciate it.
.-= Nathan Hangen´s last blog ..Social Media Has Become a Virus =-.
I have a few more of these articles simmering away. They’ll start to appear as I gain more experience.
Hi again all :)
I’ve been mulling this one over a little since earlier and it’s starting to remind me of my time playing at IM 6 or 7 or so years ago. Forgive me if my memory serves me badly but if blogs were around then they were purely for keeping a diary online and Twitter wasn’t around at all so this specific discussion wouldn’t have happened but people chasing the dream was as a much alive and well as it is now. It was all recycled money, one wannabe would sell how to advice to another wannabe.
And now it’s the same but rather than (or maybe as well as?) focussing on list building or traffic exchange sites, folks seem to think that Twitter is the magic secret ingredient. We have wannabes selling ‘how to earn money from blogging’ and ‘make $5000 with 2 hrs work on Twitter’ and all the time it’s just looking like recycled money still.
As was the case back then, there are your notable exceptions. These are the folks who everyone dreams they can be but very few ever will be because they’ll give up after their 2 hrs per week fails to earn them anything. :roll:
But I’m thinking that if we step away from this niche, maybe things aren’t quite so gloomy? If a local business has a website and a presence on Twitter, Facebook or whatever, and they engage with folks purely for the purposes of customer relations, showing that they’re helpful and reliable, all other things being equal, would a potential customer be more likely to choose that business over another because they felt that they knew them and trusted them?
I’m really thinking out loud here so am prepared to be wrong but I just suspect that it might come down to a person’s expectations when they get involved with Twitter.
Go on Twitter thinking that it will magically zap new customers to your door, you’ll be sorely disappointed but go on Twitter as part of a customer relations package and maybe it still has value?
.-= Eleanor Edwards´s last blog ..On judging a book by its cover and, what does yours say about you? =-.
There’s not much I can add to this Eleanor!
MMF schemes have probably been around as long as there has been money. Certainly, mammals practice deception whenever they can get away with it, good business: less work, more return. So I suspect swindlers have been around a long, long time.
.-= Dave Doolin´s last blog ..A Simple Guide To WordPress Theme Installation =-.
But what I’m interested to know is whether local business, you know, your regular concrete high street organisation, could use Twitter as part of something else? Could they avoid all the nonsense that you’re talking about here?
.-= Eleanor Edwards´s last blog ..1 Minute Motivator: Rinse and repeat =-.
They have it worse, way worse. They can’t ignore it, but attempting to track everything individually is impossible.
There are legions of PhD students working on this as we ponder. Some of them go to market with products. A couple may even get rich, or Google will buy them. Same difference.
I believe there are some that do, but I’m dammed if I can think of them right now. Coffee shops (or was it a pizza joint?) who advertised the special of the day on Twitter, and that sort of thing.
There are a couple of small and large busineness uses of Twitter here:
http://www.dailybits.com/crazy-twitter/
These are interesting and some are relevant too:
http://www.chrisbrogan.com/50-ideas-on-using-twitter-for-business/
Cheers,
r
.-= Ricky Buchanan´s last blog ..Control Your Cable Box With Your Mac On The Cheap! =-.
My problem is that I get momentarily focused on a path which seems to go where I want to go(more income) but as I set out up pops another idea and I get diverted on a somewhat different path. I don’t stick hard and long enough at any one path to determine that it will work. And social media is just like going to chamber of commerce meetings to chat people up. I just don’t like it. And I just don’t get it. It’s all phony. There is probably no hope for me.
Ralph, I can help you turn the whole thing upside down.
Look at this as an opportunity to build something really interesting.
Read this, and take me seriously: http://tinobox.com/wordpress/inspiration/new-obsessions-opportunities-and-whimsy-abound-in-stagnant-economies/
What’s your favorite plant?
.-= Dave Doolin´s last blog ..Not-So-Secret Blog Alliances – Kelly Diels bares (almost) all =-.
Ralph, I swear it isn’t phony.
I have a friend, Julie Roads, whom I met because she e-mailed me a gushing “I love your blog!” e-mail.
We started talking to each other on Twitter. Now we talk daily on the phone or Skype. I’m flying to New York in September to see her.
I started following Danielle LaPorte on her blog and on Twitter ten months ago. Now, we brainstorm around our kitchen tables and are collaborating on a project together.
I had dinner last week with 6 amazing women, all of whom I originally met on Twitter or Facebook. It was a passionate, engaged event. At midnight, the conversation was still flowing. We shut the restaurant down.
Social media is like the telephone: it is just a way to reach out and touch someone. What happens after that is the good part.
Kelly,
I appreciate your experience and I know you are right but it still seems phony. I’ve got some bad thinking in my head and I just can’t manage to get it knocked out.
Ralph, I don’t think it’s you. There IS a lot of phony there…but behind that there is some really good stuff.
My problem is focusing too much on the phony and not enough on the good. I almost think it’s bad that we can follow as many people as we do.
.-= Nathan Hangen´s last blog ..The Other Side of a Virus =-.
Dave,
I am trying to be open here and I know that you are trying genuinely to be helpful in getting me out of my box but I am cantankerous and obstinate and dammit I seem to like my blinders. Never in my life have I really, seriously thought about what I really like to do because that isn’t what was going to pay my bills. Plus, I have the attention span of a gnat. My favorite flower this month is Iris – they are just starting to bloom and I put in some new ones last fall. Last month it was daffodils.
Ralph, you have it, everything you need. We can all see it, you can’t. Do I need to drive up to Twain Harte or wherever and
whack you upside the headhelp you put in basil or something?.-= Dave Doolin´s last blog ..A League of Ordinary Bloggers – Anyone can do this, so few do =-.
So, are you saying I have a chance?
Do it by the numbers. You can already sit down and write, most people can’t do that.
But nobody can get you out of your box. Only you can do that.
Actually, There Is No Box.
You are a deep individual. Quickbooks, eh? If I ever have to stoop to Quickbooks, I’m hiring Kathy.http://www.balancingthebooks.com/
Dave:
Wow, thanks for including the links to all the posts that helped create this particular one. I had not read any of them but did today. :-)
As for hRecipe – going to tell two of my foodie friends about the plugin. Maybe it will help them.
I’ve been struggling with balance for a long time but it’s become more crucial now that I am a solopreneur, single mom, vacation rental owner, sister, aunt, and on and on and on.
I wish I had the answer – as I know many do. I’m the type of person who “can’t say no” and although I’ve gotten better about it I have a tendency to do things pro bono in an attempt to “prove” my worth. I’d like to say I wise-d up at some point to realize there are those that will take all they can for free. I do my best but for some it will certainly never be good enough. I chose now to invest my time/resources with those I feel most strongly about/for.
As for social media – I am trying, really trying to get past the perception that I “must” thank everyone for each and every retweet. With an average of 100 @replies, RTs and DM’s per day – it’s hard – really hard. Now that I’ve “taken the weekends off” on Twitter – it’s become increasingly difficult and there are those that are so accustomed to my previously speedier replies that have begun lashing out at me.
At the end of the day – it’s about what works for each of us – and realistic expectations.
.-= Michelle Mangen´s last blog ..How to Move Data in One Row in Excel to One Column =-.
I like how Lisis said it recently: Balance doesn’t mean stasis.
And that makes sense to me, sometimes it’s easier to stay balanced when we’re in motion. Hard to balance on a bicycle that’s not moving.
You can be moving fast and playing hard, and remain balanced. That’s what I think we’re trying to achieve here.
I love Twitter. I would marry it.
Here’s the basic thing: we do business with people we like.
Today, for example, I decided I needed an artist to hand-draw something for me.
Who did I ask? Someone I know is genius with the arteeeeste thang. Whom I like and know primarily from…wait for it…Twitter > blogging > e-mail > phone.
(yeah that someone is totally Deacon)
Now. That being said: if I was at a party with 3,030 people (my twitter following) I would
(a) not go
(b) be absolutely terrified and
(c) not have any realistic goal of speaking to everyone at that party (because I would be in the bathroom, shaking, with a very large vodka-based beverage).
IRL and online are the same thing. There are only so many relationships we can manage in either realm.
I cannot manage 3,030 relationships. I can personally manage about 12, and probably fewer than that with any degree of real, consistent depth and intimacy.
(I’m willing to bet that there is research saying that despite having a bazillion connections on all our social media platforms that we talk to the same handful of people – betting less than 20 – over and over again on Twitter, Facebook, and our phones.)
And that is why those of us who are in this social media game more than casually need products and classes and services to offer. That way the people who truly need and crave a piece of us, directly, can queue-jump and get what they need.
I’ve started thinking about every question and e-mail I don’t have the time to answer as an opportunity. The fourteen people who asked me a series of specific questions about a particular post? I could write an essay or a mini-ebook addressing those points and questions in depth, and offer it for sale. Or I could offer 20-30 minute consults with me about those issues. Or maybe I could record a podcast or a video and post it.
But I cannot answer every e-mail looking for specific, tailored advice. It isn’t possible. And I’m barely in business.
That’s totally ok. Nowhere in any of my online spaces did I hang this sign: “I will donate flesh and expertise upon request.”
Some of this brouhaha over charging and accessibility mystifies me. Not one person would walk into a store and be shocked to see prices or be astonished that the owner is not available at midnight to answer questions about how to wash the recently-purchased shirt.
Yes, I’m here to love. I want to give. Really and truly. That’s my mission in life. But love is paying the bills and feeding my kids and spending time with them without tweeting from the park bench and being accessible to the people who truly need me.
My friends need me. My clients – big and small – need me. My family needs me. My readers (maybe) need me. My partners-in-crime need me.
And those people would never write bitchy comments on my blog (or anywhere else) or suggest that I shouldn’t earn a healthy living.
So let’s not worry about the people who do.
Guest post! Guest post! Guest post!
Just kidding… sort-of-but-not-really.
Seriously, you should grab this comment, ensure you have some cleavage in it (I’m sure there’s plenty), and you now have an article for next week (or whenever).
Wow. We did first interact on twitter. That seems like so long ago now…
.-= Deacon´s last blog ..Skater Series Printing is Done =-.
Kelly – your comments are cracking me up. You and I totally need to connect on Twitter!
@mmangen
.-= Michelle Mangen´s last blog ..How to Move Data in One Row in Excel to One Column =-.
PS Naomi Dunford wrote a really good article on this, too. It helped alleviate some of the guilt I feel about not responding to some requests/messages/tweets/EVERYTHING.
http://ittybiz.com/social-media-doing-it-wrong/
Of course, if you stop replying to me, I’ll hunt you down and make you pay…or maybe just bring Ice Cream.
.-= Nathan Hangen´s last blog ..Social Media Has Become a Virus =-.
Also related, I think, is @unmarketing’s post today: http://www.yummymummyclub.ca/just_keep_going_a_caregiver_story
(And, if I can be so immodest, my recent posts, too.)
It’s an interesting problem, no doubt. We’ve seen some people change their model as they grow (Seth Godin doesn’t do comments or Twitter) and we’ve seen others try to maintain the connection as they grow. The recent articles show that really isn’t sustainable.
.-= Catherine Caine´s last blog ..Website heresy: Make yourself obsolete =-.
I’m learning I have a certain “connection comfort” level. Sort of a strategic thing.
Maintaining that level is going to require evolving the tactics to fit the load.
.-= Dave Doolin´s last blog ..Not-So-Secret Blog Alliances – Kelly Diels bares (almost) all =-.
I loved this blog it was very helpful. I am fairly new to online blogs, Twitter and the like but I am making a contious effert to get more involved with the marketing and social media community.
At first it was very overwhelming at times but i am learning. I have decided to just slot specific time to be indolved to A: keep it consistant and B: slowly build my worth to the online world. I read somewhere the other day it takes about 5 years so I realise I have to be patient and everyone started somewhere.
So hello everyone I enjoyed this read over my timmys coffee this morning!
Melanie McDonald
tweet:melanie_mcd
Melanie, yeah it takes a while. No time like now to get started though.
The business, networking and social skills you will learn are worth it.
.-= Dave Doolin´s last blog ..Why the Apple iPad Will Make Me More Productive =-.
Right now, my approach has been to do what I like to do. I think I will continue with this approach.
I like Twitter, so I use it the most. I’ve said it before, but Twitter feels like being at a big cocktail party. I treat it that way, and just have fun with it. Some people I will chat with for a minute while mixing a new drink, some I will get to know better by having a more substantial conversation with.
I dislike Facebook, so I treat it like those emails your friends send to everyone when they move or get married or get a new phone number or whatever. It’s a way to update everyone.
Blogs are like going over to a buddies place to hang out for a few minutes.
.-= Deacon´s last blog ..Skater Series Printing is Done =-.
I like it: “Do what you like to do.” That has to be the most powerful way.
Won’t work for building link support, but I’m working out how to handle that with integrity as well.
Another great one Dave. I do agree up there with Kelly, there are several people that I have met through twitter or their comments that I routinely look for inspiration or advice from. You are one, Kelly is one, Josh, Julie, Carlos, Deacon….blah blahblah these people are ones that I keep coming back to. I am still trying to work out how to feel about selling to these people, but that is the nature of the beast. Everyone can have a product that the others will want at some point.
.-= Justin Matthews´s last blog ..I don’t fit into any category you have. =-.
Head over to IttyBiz.com for an excellent discussion on money.
In short, you gotta learn to sell. So do I.
Just sell to me. I don’t offend easily. I also have credit cards and I know how to use them.
alas.
And please trust and believe I’m going to start selling any minute, too.
Each of us has some decisions to make and those decisions will determine where we spend our time and how we will monetize. There are very different business models and the sooner each of us decides where to focus the better.
I’m working on a post about this but I’ll share a short version of what I see as our choices:
1) Traditional advertising supported business model which usually focuses on Fortune 500 companies because they have the deepest pockets and therefore catering to them is where the money is.
2) Hoping to emulate the traditional advertising supported business model. This type of media buy rarely produces a positive ROI for local or small businesses so if they are wise enough to realize that there will be continual churn.
3) Generously recommending quality products, services, bloggers and causes with links and recommendations. This is a form of Word of Mouth Marketing and could include ETHICAL affiliate marketing (although WOMM marketing purists prefer only natural, non-monetized WOM).
4) Selling our own products or creating subscription-based communities. While this will limit their effectiveness to those who have resources to spend they can be beneficial when the quality is superior and the members are capable of benefiting from complex and/or advanced strategies.
We each have to decide what our style is and where we will focus our time, energy and money. For me, I have chosen to support the DoFollow CommentLuv KeywordLuv community explained in the post I will link to the main URL field (not CommentLuv link) in this comment.
Either we are going to emulate big business and try to get others to pay for our work or traffic up front (and thereby limit the benefit of what we do to those who are already able to pay) OR we can support those who deserve it freely and find ways to monetize that do not depend on advertising.
I believe the world is in the state it is in because we have allowed the few elite to set the rules and those rules favor them and big brands. Google has already announced that they are going to “clean up” the Internet “cesspool” by favoring brands. (I can provide the link if you would like to read that yourself.)
There is only one solution to the economic decline that is inevitable. Those who are interested can read more about it in the post I’ll put in CommentLuv in this comment.
.-= Gail from GrowMap´s last blog ..Why Marketing is NOT Evil =-.
Sent you an email.